Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize