Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize
