ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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