its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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