a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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