But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
