Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
