Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
