piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
is that a dick in a sweater?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
