We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
