when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize