I don't usually arrange sex via text message
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
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