I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
