somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
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