maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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