I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
