Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Say something about gay babies.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Randomize
