Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
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