Sry I called you an 8
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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