I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
