I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
