I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
