Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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