Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
