Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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