First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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