But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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