The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Randomize