This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Randomize
