it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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