I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
