You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize