then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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