I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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