but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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