There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
