I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
