so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Randomize
