yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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