I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
