people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
