Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
