You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize