the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
