Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize