so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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