this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize