oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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