Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize