you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Randomize
